


Hard To Believe

by Aston (AstonT)



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - No betrayal, Fix-It, Gen, talk of destiny
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-24
Updated: 2017-01-24
Packaged: 2018-09-19 17:35:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 458
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9452477
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AstonT/pseuds/Aston
Summary: "To kill him would be to kill you."Merlin fears the worst after his 'betrayal' of Mordred's faith in him."





	

Merlin had felt all sorts of pain throughout his life - the pain of hunger, of thirst, of being an outsider, of being hated.

Physical pain from beatings from neighboring kids in Ealdor and from Arthur during training on a bad day.

But he knew the worst sort of pain to be purely mental, emotional.

As he stood watching Mordred leave, that pain flared up, and he didn't understand why. They weren't close, after all.

But no matter the why, he found himself sinking to the floor weakly once the Druid Knight was gone, his mental shield in tatters.

No one who passed through asked what was wrong, and honestly he was glad for it. Because he knew he couldn't explain.

And then, suddenly, Mordred's voice sounded in his head.

" _Emrys?"_

It took a moment for Merlin to muster the strength to answer.

" _What is it?"_

No answer came, but it didn't surprise him. The pain that followed, however, did. 

* * *

It was late afternoon when Mordred found Merlin sitting in the last place he'd seen him. 

He frowned at the prone form of the warlock, slumped against the wall, knees drawn close and his head down.

He looked like he had the weight of the entire world on him, and for some reason, that bothered Mordred.

"What's wrong?"

Merlin's head shot up, searching Mordred's face out before he gave a weak smile and a shrug in response.

Mordred sighed, nodding and sitting down with him. "Did you think I was leaving, that I'd betray you?"

"I..." Merlin started, a lie ready on his tongue, but it died when he caught Mordred's eye. He lowered his gaze and nodded.

Silence fell and Merlin knew that Mordred wasn't sure how he was meant to feel about it all.

"I wouldn't do that to you,"

Merlin glanced back up, meeting his gaze to see understanding laying within icy blue eyes. "Really?"

Mordred nodded, leaning back. "I can't just betray you and leave, turn against a man who's been kind to me. Even if I wanted him dead, I wouldn't be able to deal the fatal blow,"

"Why?" Merlin found himself asking, slightly surprised at the honesty he heard in the Druid's words.

Mordred was quiet for a while before he sighed, holding Merlin's gaze as he spoke, letting him see the sincerity in his eyes. "Because to kill Arthur would be to kill you, and I have no wish to do that, Emrys."

Merlin gave a weak smile and nodded that he understood. "Then...I'm sorry. For how I've treated you," he offered, though he knew it was weak.

"Friends?" Mordred asked, holding a hand out.

Merlin stared at it for a moment before he nodded, shaking it with a grin. "Friends."


End file.
